What happens in the first session?

Mostly talking. The psychologist gathers background — what's been happening, since when, what you've already tried — and starts building a relationship with your child. Formal testing, if it's needed at all, usually comes later, not in session one.

Should my child be in the room for the whole appointment?

It varies. Some psychologists start with everyone together, then spend part of the session with your child alone. Others do it the other way round. Ask the practice how they structure it when you book, so nobody's surprised on the day.

How do I explain the appointment to my child without making it sound scary?

Keep it plain and low-stakes: someone whose job is helping kids talk about big feelings, not a doctor who fixes what's wrong. Avoid words like "problem" or "wrong" — they raise the stakes for a conversation that should feel ordinary.

Questions to Ask Before Your Child's First Psychologist Appointment

Booking the appointment is the hard part. Once it’s on the calendar, most of the anxiety is about the unknown — what do you ask, what actually happens, how do you get your child through the door without dread setting in.

This covers all three. For the steps before this point — referrals, rebates, choosing someone — see the full pathway to finding a child psychologist.

What actually happens in the first session

Less than most parents expect. The first appointment is largely about the psychologist getting to know your child and understanding what’s been going on — not testing, not diagnosing, not fixing anything on day one.

Expect questions about:

what you’ve noticed, and when it started
what’s already been tried at home or school
your child’s routines, sleep, friendships and interests
what you’re hoping the appointment will help with

Some psychologists spend the whole session with you and your child together. Others split the time, with part of it one-on-one with your child. Neither is wrong — ask the practice which format they use when you book, so you both know what to expect.

Questions worth asking before you book

A quick phone call before the first appointment can save you a wasted session:

have you worked with children this age, and with this specific concern before?
how do you usually involve parents — session by session, or with a separate check-in?
roughly how many sessions do families like ours typically need?
what’s your cancellation and rebooking policy?

Questions worth asking once you’re in the room

what did you notice in today’s session?
what would help most between now and next time?
how will we know if this is working?

That last one matters more than it seems. Not every first fit is the right fit — it’s entirely normal to try a different psychologist if the first one isn’t clicking with your child, and asking early how progress gets reviewed makes that easier to judge honestly.

How to prepare your child, in plain language

Keep the description simple and ordinary. “Someone who helps kids talk about big feelings” lands far better than anything that sounds like a diagnosis or a punishment. You don’t need to explain the referral process or the Mental Health Treatment Plan — that’s paperwork, not something your child needs to carry into the room.

If your child asks “what’s wrong with me,” the honest answer is nothing — this is just extra help, the same as a tutor for maths, except it’s for feelings.

What not to worry about

A quiet first session isn’t a bad sign. Kids often warm up slowly, and psychologists who work with children expect that. There’s no rush to a diagnosis, and there doesn’t need to be one at all — plenty of appointments are simply about building skills, not labelling anything.

Waiting for the first appointment is its own kind of hard, and our big feelings guides cover the everyday strategies that help in the meantime. If cost is what’s holding you back from booking, the real numbers on what a psychologist costs in Australia are worth a look before you rule it out.

This article is general parenting guidance, not clinical advice, and is not a substitute for seeing a qualified professional. If you are worried about your child, our finding support guides explain where to start in Australia.